A Way To You
by irontallica666
Summary: When a psychic at the local fair tells Dean his future, he shruggs it off. Until he finds himself in a situation that looks a lot like the psychic predicted, and he tries his very best to change it.
1. Chapter 1

**Ch1: "cmon Dean, it'll be fun! Please? For me?" And that's how Dean (19) ends up by a physic at the local fair with Sam(13). the physic tells him he will fall in love with a blue-eyed person named Cas. dean just shrugs it off because he never wants to fall in love. love is stupid, in his opinion. he is more like the one night stand types of guys. he and sam have a nice time for the rest of the day.**

"Oh, come on, Dean, it will be fun! Please? For me?"

And that's how 19-years old Dean ends up at the local fair with his little brother Sam, who just turned 13 a few days ago. Sam had finally convinced Dean to go with him, and now they were both at the local fair.

they walked around for a while, and then Sam saw something. "Look, Dean! A physic, can we go?"

"Sure," Dean replied. Physics were fake anyways, but if it made Sammy happy...

The physic told Sam that he was going to be happy later, and that he should be happy to have Dean as a brother. Sam nodded enthusiastically and said Dean was the best brother in the world. It made Dean's heart flutter with happiness.

When the physic took Dean's hand, she looked him right in the eyes. "You will fall in love with a blue-eyed person named Cas," she said. "I can't say more." she kept holding his hand and staring at him, it was very awkward.

"Yeah, sure," Dean mumbled. He quickly yanked his hand back, and walked backwards. Sam thanked her and then they were outside in the sunlight again. He blinked, and watched behind him, the woman smiled and nodded.

He took Sam's hand. "Let's walk further," he said, not wanting to be around her again.

 _Fall in love,_ the woman had said. That was utter bullshit, Dean Winchester didn't do 'love'. Love was stupid, and it would hurt you so why even start it? He only had a one-night stand every once in a while, and that was it. Love could get you attached, and when you get attached, you are able to get hurt. Hence, Dean wasn't planning on falling in love, _ever._

"Are you okay?" Sam suddenly asked. He has seen Dean frowning and thought it probably had to do with what the physic had said. "I'm sorry, Dean, I didn't know-"

"It's okay," Dean reassured him. "C'mon, I have a surprise for you," and he grabbed in his pocket and showed Sam the money he had been saving. "Have been saving some to get you a birthday present."

The smile shown on Sam's face was one of the biggest Dean had ever seen. "Thank you so much, Dean! You're the best!"

"Oh c'mon, you don't even know what it is yet! How are you loving it already?" Dean replied, but he was laughing. He didn't even know what he'd buy, but he'd make sure it was the best Sam had ever gotten. They didn't have much money, and both of them got remembered of it regularly. Like when they had bread for dinner, 'because it was easier'. But they both knew they simply didn't have any money for a full meal that night.

Their dad had brought in the money, until the day he died. A terrible accident took his life, and from that moment, the only thing they got was the monthly small amount of money from the government. Their mom worked too, but it wasn't enough. Dean worked every day in the regular shop and every Saturday on the market close to their home, and had been saving a little bit of money every week for Sam's birthday.

He remembered his 17th birthday, when Sam was only 11. He got woken up by his little brother at 5 in the morning, and he didn't even have time to be angry, because Sammy was so excited. He had sung four songs and danced on Dean's bed with them. When their mom came to bring breakfast, Sam couldn't hold it back any more.

"I have a gift for you!" he yelled, and pulled out something wrapped in last week's newspaper.

Curious, Dean unpacked it, and out of the newspaper came a leather cord with something hanging on it. An amulet. It was a weird one, and Dean had never seen it before, nor was it something he would look twice at. Yet, when Sam gave it to him, he studied it, and then immediately hung it around his neck.

"Sam, how did you even get this? Where have you got it from?" he asked.

"Don't you like it?" Sam sounded unsecure, suddenly. "I saw it a few weeks ago, in the store around the corner. You know, the one with all the old books. I thought I'd buy it for you, so I started helping people crossing the street and selling their stuff on the streets. I didn't have enough money but the owner gave it to me anyways. I just thought-"

"Sam," Dean interrupted him. "I love it, thank you so much." He remembered Sam being home later than usually, and it became clear what he had been doing.

The fact that the 11 years old Sam had been doing extra things, saving up money, and instead of buying himself something nice, the first thought he had was buying a birthday present for his brother made Dean so emotional, he had to clear his throat a few times before he could speak again. Luckily, Sam didn't notice it, overly loudly singing "Happy birthday" to him.

Mary, however, had to look away and wipe a tear from her cheek. This was the exact reason why she loved her boys so much.

Dean hadn't taken off the amulet once since that day.

The rest of the day, Dean didn't even think about what the physic had said any more. The only thing that mattered was Sammy having a good time, and well… that he was having. They did everything they could, Sam's birthday present was a huge teddy bear Dean had won at the shooting game, and at the end of the day, Dean had just enough money left for some food, which they brought back home.

Long after Sam had fallen asleep, declaring this was the 'best birthday he'd ever had', Dean and Mary were sitting in the living room, talking. Mary wanted Dean to go to college, even though he's already 19. "You are so smart, I don't want you to waste all your time on working. I'm sure we'll handle it here."

However, Dean wasn't planning on leaving them alone, he'd rather keep working than spending all the money they had on college. Besides, Sam would be absolutely broken if Dean left. It was a discussion they had more than often these days, but Mary would always give in, knowing Dean wouldn't listen to her.

So, this evening too, ended with Dean stating he'd keep working until he was sure he could leave without getting Mary and Sam in trouble.

"Good night, Dean. And thank you for making Sam's day," she added. "Both of you are the best sons I could ever wish for."  
Dean smiled and reached up to touch the amulet. "I'm glad I could do it," he replied, and with a 'good night' back, he went to bed too.


	2. Chapter 2

It was a year later when Dean, 20 years old, finally saved up enough money to go to college. When the government realized that when Dean would be leaving, they gave in and now Mary had a monthly contribution, enough for Sam and her to live on.

He had found a college where he could go to school half of the time, and the other half, he worked to save up money for the next year. It was unusual, but it worked. He was smart enough to miss half of his classes and still get good grades.

He found a job at a store not far from college. After being denied at many stores because he "wasn't motivated enough" or he "didn't look like he could work in that place." Dean was getting sick of being denied everywhere. With his last hope, he filled in an application at the Stop 'N Shop, and finally he got accepted.

His first week was not that easy, but he learned quickly. Soon, he knew where everything was placed, how to operate the cash desk and a lot of other things. He also made two friends, something he did not do very easily.

He was just putting more coffee on the shelves when someone stood beside him.

"Hey you must be the new one. Welcome here, I'm Jo and this is Castiel," a girl said.

"Uh yea, hi," Dean replied. "Dean."

At first, it was a bit strange. He didn't have that much friends, and people never seemed to befriend him. But as soon as he got to know Castiel and Jo, he was glad he talked to them. They hung out together outside their work, and even while working, they still talked a lot.

Over the months, they had become really good friends. Dean's mother sometimes bought her groceries at the Stop 'N Shop, asking how Dean was. Now that he had gone to college and work, they didn't see much of each other.

When she brought Sam with her one day, Dean almost teared up over how much he missed his little brother. Sure, Sam could be a pain in the ass sometimes, but after all, he was still his brother.

Sam decided he liked Castiel and Jo and proudly told them he bought the necklace with the amulet for Dean when he was 11. When they told him how sweet it was of him, he seemed to glow with pride. Dean watched them and smiled. He had chosen good friends.

When Dean wasn't working, he was either at school or doing studying. He was smart, but keeping up with classes and a job really took its toll. One day, Jo came up to him at the store and told him "they were going out tonight, no denying." By then, Dean had known her long enough that if she wanted to do something, she wouldn't take no for an answer.

She, took Dean and Castiel to a bar where they ordered a beer. "Both of you need to relax a little," she told them.

"I'm relaxed," Castiel tried. Jo just laughed.

"You are holding that beer like it's your last hope to survive. Loosen up a bit!"

Dean smiled at her attempts. Castiel hadn't been that social, but still, he and Dean got along together very well. So well, Jo even teased them. "Are you guys canon yet?" she'd ask every once in a while. And they always replied with no, because _what even was 'canon'?_

While letting his thoughts drift away, he actually felt himself relaxing. The bar was a nice place, the beer was nice and he allowed himself to not think about the many homework assignments and studying he had yet to do.

Suddenly, a sound made him snap out of his thoughts. It was Castiel. And he was... _laughing?_

Yes, Dean didn't hear or see it wrong. Jo had finally managed to make Cas laugh, and _damn_ if that didn't just look like the sunshine had come through the clouds on a rainy day. His head was thrown back and he was shaking with laughter. _Real laughter,_ not those little smiles he always gave when he thought something was funny.

And sure, Dean didn't mind the smiles, but this was something else. He didn't realize he was staring until Cas talked to him.

"Dean? Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"

Dean shook his head abruptly. "No, I'm just... I zoned out for a minute, I'm sorry. But... what the _hell_ made you laugh _that hard?"_

"I did it," Jo told him proudly. "I told him a joke I heard earlier."

"Okay, so how do you make holy water?" Cas asked, still laughing.

"I don't know, I suppose you have to say a spell and do some holy stuff with it?" Dean replied.

"Nope," Cas told him. "You just- You-" He needed to pause whatever he was going to say, because he was laughing again. "You just boil the _hell_ out of it!" Again, he erupted in a fit of laughter.

This time, Dean laughed too. It _was_ a funny joke, he had to admit.

At the end of the evening, they were about to say goodbye when Jo held them back. "Shouldn't I be getting something?"

"Thank you?" Dean tried.

"Exactly! And thank me for _what?"_

 _"_ Oh! I think I get it!" Castiel exclaimed, a bit tipsy from the beers he's had. "Thank you for the great night?"

"You're welcome," Jo told them with a smug grin. "I told you, you guys need to relax more."

They had gone out together much more after that. And, it was Dean and Jo's new mission to get Castiel laughing. They found out it was actually pretty simple. If the joke was lame enough, Castiel would laugh.

During their time together, both Jo and Dean had just started calling Castiel 'Cas' ("But why?"), simply because it was easier. Cas didn't really understand, but he just went with it.

Their friendship lasted for a long time, they went out, they had fun, and their lives were going well. Dean and Cas tried to stop Jo's teasing, but it only made her tease them more.

One night, Dean sat outside, something he always had liked to do. It was always so peaceful when the city was asleep. He sat on his roof quietly, letting his thoughts drift away.

He thought about how well his life was going right now, going to college and having a job. But even more: having friends. He made a few friends in college, under which a totally crazy girl named Charlie, but Jo and Cas would always be no.1 to him.

As he sat there, thinking, he realized something. Jo wouldn't tease him and Cas if she was sure nothing was there. _But was there something?_ He thought more about it, and how he and Cas had gotten along the past few months. Sure, they were great friends, but had there been something else too?

As if on cue, he suddenly remembered the words of the physic, now one and a half year ago. _You will fall in love with a blue-eyed person named Cas,_ she had said. And Cas did have blue eyes. But... Dean didn't do love. Love was stupid and so were feelings and all the trouble that came with them.

So, that night Dean decided he could only do what Dean did the best: no matter how much it hurt, he would shut down his friendship with Cas.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ch3:** Cas still sees Dean regularly at the mall, but that's it. they dont hang out any more and they dont invite each other over again. most of the time when Dean comes to the mall, he has brought back another girl. the first girlfriend he has is called Cassie, and they last for 2 weeks. the next one is called Kasey. this one does last for almost a month before Dean comes back angry and alone. Cas can only comfort him, _again._

Cas didn't understand. One day, he and Dean were doing great, hanging out at Dean's dorm room, and the next day, Dean doesn't reply to his texts or calls.

Dean didn't show up at work for three days. Cas and Jo figured out he must be busy with school. When he came to the Stop 'N Shop on Friday, he greeted them as if nothing happened. "Busy," was the only thing he said to their questions of why he didn't reply to anything.

Everything seemed to be alright. But something was wrong. Dean acted like he always, did, talking and doing his job, but he wasn't himself.

A week later, Dean didn't talk as much as he used to, getting Cas worried. He tried to talk to Dean but Dean wouldn't hear him, saying he was fine.

"But we have barely talked in a week!" Cas protested. "We haven't hung out, we _always_ hang out at least once a week!"

It didn't work.

After another week of only polite smiles and sometimes a small talk, Dean came to the Stop 'N Shop with a girl, and Cas understood. He understood, but he was sad too. Couldn't Dean have just _told_ him? They had become pretty great friends, how hard was it to tell your friend you can't hang out any more because you got a girlfriend?

The girl's name was Cassie, and she was a nice girl. She had raven black hair and it curled around her shoulders. Cas understood why Dean liked her.

Jo didn't let him go that easily. "So you practically ignored _us,_ your best friends, for a _girl?_ No offense," she added, smiling at Cassie. It didn't look very convincing, and knowing Jo, it probably wasn't meant to be convincing either.

Cassie looked a bit uncomfortable, but smiled back anyways.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" Dean said. "I got a girlfriend and I am happy with her. Can you just accept it instead of bashing me?" He sounded a bit angrier than he was, but it didn't really matter. "C'mon," he said to Cassie and took her by her hand.

As they left, Jo and Cas looked at each other. "The hell was that all about?" Jo asked, and Cas could only shake his head.

"If he's happy, it's okay," he just said and then went back to work.

The next day, Dean apologized for being so rude, but Jo wasn't so easily forgiving. "You practically ignored us," she said sternly, filling the shelf a little bit angrier than usual.

"Yeah, I know, but you didn't have to tell me that in front of her! That was downright embarrassing!"

Jo shrugged. "You owe me and Cas a round at the bar," she said, just wanting to be done with it.

"Deal," Dean told her.

Dean and Cassie last for another week, and then suddenly, on a quiet evening, when Cas had just settled down on the couch with a cup of tea and a good book, the doorbell ringed. He looked up, surprised. Who would need him at 11pm on a normal weekday? As he opened the door, Dean is standing there, and he looked both angry and upset.

"You got something strong?" he asked, and then sat down on the couch, not bothering to explain himself. Luckily, Cas had older brothers, and usually when their girlfriends broke up with them, they reacted in the same way as Dean did. So, Cas was smart enough to get a bottle of Vodka somewhere, and just sat there, not saying anything until Dean started talking.

It took him half the bottle, and once he started talking, the only thing he said were random drunken slurs that sounded a lot like "should've known better" and "can't trust anyone". He let Cas comfort him till he fell asleep.

When he woke up, he noticed he was laying on the couch, but his shoes were taken off, a blanket was carefully placed on him, and on the table next to the couch stood a glass of water and painkillers. Gladly, Dean took the painkillers and drank the entire glass of water in one gulp.

Standing up to get himself more water, he noticed a piece of paper laying on the other table.

 _Dean,_ it read.

 _Good morning, I hope you feel not too bad after last night. I have to go to college so I left you some bread and coffee. I won't be back till late this evening, so if you could lock the door with the spare key (laying on the table) and place it under the doormat outside it'd be very appreciated. You can take a shower too, clean towels are in the most left drawer._

 _See you at work_

 _\- Cas_

Dean smiled, and after he took a shower, had breakfast and left a thank-you-note for Cas, he locked the door and placed the key where Cas told him.

The next time Dean got a girlfriend, he was smart enough to tell Cas and Jo immediately, bringing her to work and introducing her as Kasey.

Kasey was a very optimistic girl, but she and Dean fitted together in Cas' opinion. Jo thought they were the worst couple ever, whispering all kinds of insults about them to Cas when they went to the bar again. Dean had asked if Kasey could go with them, and now they were being all love-y, almost making Jo puke.

When a few weeks later the doorbell rang, Cas could see Dean standing there. He immediately recognized the same look as before on Dean's face and got the Whiskey for him.

The next day when Cas came home, he found another thank-you-note, and some money. _I'll feel bad if I just drink all your stuff without paying for it,_ Dean had written. Cas used the money to buy a bottle of rum, something he thought he'd be needing for Dean in a few weeks.


	4. Chapter 4

It went on for months. Dean had been hooking up with a Cassandra, Kassidy, and even a Cassia, and every time it goes wrong, he finds himself at Cas' doorstep, feeling guilty for showing up again, but also not knowing where else to go.

Cas always lets him in, lets him drink whatever he's got for him, and lets him ramble about whatever girl it didn't work with till he falls asleep on the couch. And every time when he wakes up, Cas has left him another note, another glass of water with painkillers, and another breakfast.

It's gotten to the point where Dean doesn't even introduce his girlfriends (if that's what you can call it) any more, not caring whether it goes wrong or not. He's forgotten why he even started all this bullshit, but every time he meets another girl, another spark of hope flows and every damn time, the spark dies.

He knows it isn't easy for Cas, and every time he leaves a thank-you-note. He doesn't know Cas smiles sadly, mumbling a soft "you're welcome", and then goes to bed because he didn't sleep enough the night before, not wanting to leave Dean in his misery.

It has been quiet for a while. Dean has just worked, went to college, hung out with Jo and Cas, but he still finds himself searching for something.

When he meets Cassira, he's afraid, afraid this would go wrong again, afraid he'd end up on Cas' doorstep again, but it doesn't.

Cassira is everything Dean could wish for, she's polite, but not _too_ polite. She's nice, and is able to let Dean go his way. She's got an amazing smile and dashing blue eyes.

After a few weeks of hearing the news, Cas had been waiting for Dean to show up again, but when it's 8 weeks later and they're still together, Cas knows Dean found a good one. He misses Dean, but he's happy for him, too.

Dean and Cassira take things more seriously than Dean has ever did, going to the movies, dinners, and all that. She sometimes comes to the grocery store where they work, and after a while, Dean takes her with them when he, Cas and Jo go to the bar again. This time, Jo doesn't even mind. Cassira is way more awesome than all the other girls Dean has ever dated, she states.

While Dean and Cas talk about all random stuff, Jo finds herself in a conversation about whether a TV show is good or bad when it makes you bawl your eyes out. Both her and Cassira agree a TV show should make you feel certain things, and at the end of the night, they are literally battling over a few ships, under which whether Tony & Steve or Bucky & Steve would go together better.

Dean cuts them off, saying they should just ship it as a threesome, making Jo and Cassira absolutely silent for one second before heavily fangirling over all the good things about it. Cas smiles, he's really glad it has finally worked out.

Dean and Cassira last for a good 4 months. It's still all going fine, and everything's great, but then she says something that makes Dean stop dead in his tracks.

"You know," she tells him. "It's funny how everything seems to have the same nickname for me, except you."

"How do you mean?" he asks. He's in a good mood, they're walking back after another night in the bar with Cas and Jo, and tomorrow he'll receive his paycheck again.

"Well, everyone calls me Cassie for short, but out of the 30 people that have given me a nickname, you're the only one who keeps calling me Cas," she tells him.

He doesn't think of it that much, until it suddenly hits him. Every girl he's dated, he's called Cas for short. Every single one.

" _You will fall in love with a blue-eyed person named Cas,"_ the physic told him, now 4 years ago.

"Dean? Are you okay? Is something wrong?" Cassira asks him, but he just shakes his head and starts walking again.

"No, I'm fine, just a little dizzy," he lies. Cassira doesn't know anything about the other girls, but she just made him realize what he's been missing the entire time.

He realizes his life got a lot better when he met Cas. He realizes his heartbreaks weren't all so bad, because Cas was always there for him. He realizes Cas has been there for him the entire time, whether Dean was happy or not, Cas was there. He realizes he may have been falling for Cas even though he's tried to ignore it.

He also realizes he's been a terrible friend to Cas and maybe Cas doesn't even like him at all. Maybe all Cas feels is pity, because Dean's not able to solve his problems by himself.

When they get to her dorm room, Dean doesn't tell her anything. He just wishes her a good night, and then goes to his own room.

He doesn't sleep for the entire night, thinking about it, how exactly does he even feel about Cas? And Cassira? Does he _love_ Cassira? She's an amazing girl, that's for sure, but is that it?

The next few days, he can't stop thinking about it, and then finally manages to tell her. "I'm so sorry," he tells her. "You are truly amazing and our time was also amazing but I just can't, I'm sorry."

"No worries," she tells him. She doesn't sound angry. "I've seen it coming anyways. Thanks for the time we had together."

As he walks her to the door, she turns around one more time and kisses his cheek. "Have a good time with the _real_ Cas," she whispers, and then she smiles one more time and walks away.

It doesn't matter that it's almost 12 and Dean should be going to bed. It doesn't matter that it's cold outside and Dean doesn't have a jacket or anything. It doesn't matter that Cas goes to a whole other college that's 20 minutes away. Dean runs the entire way, and then pauses in front of the door.

He's stood here a lot of times, all times heartbroken, waiting for Cas to make him feel better. This seemed like a great idea when he started running, but now that he's standing here, he thinks of chickening out and just leaving Cas alone.

What if Cas already has someone else? What if Cas doesn't like him? What if-

He shuts off his thoughts and before he can run away again, he presses the doorbell. He waits for Cas to open the door, and when he doesn't, Dean rings again. By the time Cas opens the door, Dean is a nervous, sweaty mess, already turned around to walk away and come back another time.

"Dean?" Cas asks, and Dean turns around. Holy shit, since when did Cas have eyes, _bluer than the fucking ocean?_

"Dean, are you okay? Did something go wrong? Here, come in, it's cold outside."

Once inside, Dean goes to sit on the couch, and Cas sits next to him, waiting.

"I just…" Dean starts, not knowing what to say. Dammit, why did he come here unprepared? "I just wanted to apologize, for always showing up here, after whatever I had went wrong, and I'm so sorry for being a terrible friend, if you could even call me that and I'm so sorry for not explaining, and it's.. it's a funny story, actually," he says.

"Like, 4 years ago, I went to this physic at the fair," he goes on, not looking at Cas, just rambling off his entire story so that he can run away as fast as possible when he's done. "I uh.. she told me I'd fall in love with a blue eyed person named Cas, and I just shrugged it off y'know, because I don't do love, and then I started having feels for you and I tried to ignore them and I tried everything I could with evert 'Cas' I could find but they just all-"

He gets cut off by Cas, who takes Dean's face in his hands, forcing Dean to look at him. "It's okay," he says, "I forgive you." And then he's kissing Dean, and Dean is kissing Cas, and this is the best kiss he's ever shared, with any Cas.

Because, this, this is _his_ Cas.


End file.
